Some people don't realize other people's feelings, and some people over analyze them. My feelings hurt me, I look way into everything. But I really need my family and friends to know, I hate myself more than anyone else.
Every little argument, every time I talk back, I'm scared of exposing myself. I'm scared of every conversation exposing my ugly side. I hate feeling stupid. I really hate it, because the whole world is made of that stupid jealous nature. I'm just as full of it as well. I'm so angry and confused. Don't get me wrong, there are times when I can really openly admit I'm stupid.

I love all my family. I just really don't want them to see me as stupid. I don't mean the stupidity in math and science and stuff. I mean my perception and maturity towards things. The only person I wish didn't exist is me, I can't handle living in a world that drains you. I am naturally a weak person.

I don't try caring about my looks any more, because looks are not real. The words you say are not real. If an animal can live with being fat, and not care at all why can't you? The whole world is supposed to be so natural. The world is chemical, but human mix up the wrong ones. We have added another chromosome to our DNA and screwed us up. We are living in our own insanity of meaning. All we every were is existing. Nothing more. No heaven. No hell. No god. The existence of heaven is just the human want of more life.
And hell is to try and control people. All there ever was for people was hope.

A lot of people say they believe a revolution and think of small things like women doing men things. Women and men are genders. And genders are used for reproduction. The reproduction instinct is also mistaken for love. But do not misunderstand, there are people I've liked before. But people have evolved it a little, to the point were you don't recognize it.


To let you all know I'm not really depressed right now.

To anyone who still visits my page, I am so sorry for how not good my appearances on here are... I am just feeling really unmotivated lately... Really unmotivated. I am trying to bring myself together and start working on stuff, so hopefully I can get stuff up.

Oh yeah, I wrote in this journal thing about my teacher wanting a picture done before, but DA was doing maintenance, and it was long too! So I gave up and forgot to tell you... BLEH... So now I'll tell you! One of my teachers wanted a picture done to be put on a wall somewhere, he got me pencil crayons for it too! ...My sister thought from my description that it was a dirty old man, but no! 1. He is young. 2. he is married to a very nice lady. and 3. He just wants the picture, I don't have to go paint it there.

Plus, he has asked other students for other projects as well.
But I've even slacked on this as well, it drove me mad trying figure out something for good picture, maybe someone could suggest something for me? That would be swell!


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Clubs

I'm starting to re-do a bunch of my old crap, so maybe once in a while you should check back on stuff.



Done:
Temptation: [link]
Dip is evil-remix: [link]

Working on:
Them piggies: [link]
Argh this monkey suit: [link]
Melty:[link]
The stick peoples: [link] [link] [link] [link] [link] [link] [link] [link]
Uhhh...: [link]

I might do more. If you there is one that you think should be re-done just tell me.


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Clubs
(not official yet.)

Yayyy!!! I R PR0UDz!!!!111one!

Maybe I'll draw something up...

I got an awsome game on friday, Drawn to life! ! I love it, I think I played it for 3 hours straight yesterday, lol....

I'm so freakin' laaazzy.......

I want fruit in my oatmeal...
And I am really bored, any one want requests? Please?
Graaahhhrgg......





Poo